Nataliya (28), Sofia (5)

Monday, March 26, 2022, Rusovce. Day 30 of the war.

How would you explain to your child that the war had started? What would you tell your kid when you are alone on the verge of a nervous breakdown, not knowing what is going on, or what to do at that moment? What would you pack? What will you need? For how long will you have to leave? None of us knows the answers to these questions. Because we didn't experience what 28-year-old Nataliya did, because we didn't experience the war.

“We have arrived about a week ago. I don't remember the exact date, I don't know what day it is even now. It was still calm in Lviv in the beginning. Gradually, people from other parts of Ukraine began to come to us. We listened to the sound of exploding bombs 10 kilometers from us all night. We learned that there were more than 300 injured and 50 victims in the morning. That's when we realized we had to leave. Lviv has a population of 800,000, there were already about 200,000 refugees at the time. We knew that when all these people started leaving, we might not be able to do so. I am a Slovak language teacher. I started contacting friends in Slovakia and they helped me to get here. I will be forever grateful to them and I will pray for them. We traveled for about two days, there were a lot of cars everywhere, there were a lot of people at the border. The weather was bad. I said the heavens were crying as it was raining, it was cold." 

"I came here with my 5-year-old daughter, and my mother-in-law, who is 74 years old. She has heart problems. We had air raids every day. We were hiding in the basement because we don't have anti-bomb shelters. Then we read that the basement is not a good place to hide, as it has only one exit. If we were buried there, we would never get out of there. We tried to stay next to the blocks of flats to be protected when fleeing the city. We managed to carry two small suitcases. We came to Uzhhorod and from there we continued on foot through Vysne Nemecke. I bought train tickets to Kosice, the train was supposed to leave at four o'clock. We were put on a bus when we crossed the border. The driver waited until the bus was full. We missed our train and the next one leaving at 10 at night, the arrival was supposed to be at 8 in the morning. My daughter gets sick to her stomach when travelling. Luckily we met a gentleman there, his name was Jozef, he drove us all the way to Bratislava. We have agreed that if we win, he and his wife would come to us and we would show them our beautiful country. We will rebuild everything and we will have everything again."

"Our family which accommodated us has 5 children, they are all trying to help us. It was difficult at first because their children do not speak Ukrainian and my child does not speak Slovak. They play together and have already learned a few words. We feel support everywhere, like in the store, or when people advise me which bus to get on." 

"We didn't expect something like this to happen. Lviv is 600 km far from Kiev, so we didn't hear any explosions that morning. I woke up to my phone ringing all the time. I read a message from my mother who wrote, "Take your things, the war has begun." At that moment, I didn't understand what was going on, I didn't know what to do. Didn't know what to pack. I didn't know what to take with me. I tried to pack everything I saw. But then I realized I couldn't take everything with me. I sat down and started crying. I couldn't move for about 2 hours. Then my daughter woke up. I didn't know how to explain what happened to her. I told her that we were all afraid that the war would start and that the war had just begun. That she doesn't have to worry as I am with her and that I will do my best to keep us safe. It didn't work because she saw that I didn't know what to do either. After a few days, my daughter told me that she could not watch a film in Russian. She told me, "Mom, you have to throw it all away!" We used to watch cartoons and TV series in Russian. Now he refuses, saying that they are attacking us, that they are killing us. She asked me about why they wanted to kill us, and I couldn't answer her question. I still don't know why." 

"I'm afraid Putin will unite with China. Ukraine is the largest European country. When Putin crosses Ukraine, he will reach Lviv, which is 60 km far from Poland. He will go on, he will go to the Baltic countries, Poland, Slovakia ... I'm afraid that Europe is getting used to seeing photos of the war, not so much is written about it in the newspapers these days. I'm afraid the war will last a very long time. In eastern Ukraine - in Luhansk and Donbas - it has lasted for 8 years. We know about it, because we send money to the army, we have volunteers who help there. Am I afraid to think about where we will go, where everyone will flee when (Putin) crosses our borders and goes on? So far, only 5 million people have left Ukraine, but there are 40 millions of us, we are a big country. We need NATO to help us. I understand that they cannot fight with us because there is a threat of a third world war, but they can give us weapons. We need planes, we need better weapons. We have tanks and we have rifles, but that's not enough. We need to protect our skies. We need help!" 

"You (in Slovakia) are already feeling the effects of this war, the prices are rising. It won't get any better unless we stop the war. If he comes here, where do we run? To Africa? I don't know where we'll all run. I keep saying it, as it's important, we need help! The Russians don't allow the creation of green (humanitarian) corridors in Mariupol, people have been living there without water, energy, gas, they have nothing to eat for two weeks now. More than 10,000 people have died there. They shoot at people trying to escape. When you go to the store, they shoot at you. Similar things happened in Leningrad, back when it was attacked by the fascists. Now it's happening in Mariupol. With the difference that the Russian fascists are shooting at us. We call them "ruscists". They behave like fascists. Sanctions do not help, the situation is getting worse. I'm afraid to look at the phone, I'm afraid to look at what's going on. It has to end." 

"I'm worried about my loved ones who stayed in Ukraine. My mom and dad, grandma, uncle, they're all there. Mom is a doctor, she tells me that there are more and more injured coming in every day. It's terrible. Although I am safe, I think of war all the time, I think of my family every day. I know I have to live on because I have a baby and that I shouldn't cry all the time. But when I go out for coffee, I feel guilty. I ask myself how can I do that? Someone is hiding in the basements and bunkers and I'm going out for coffee? But it makes me very happy. These are flashes of normalcy that help me a lot mentally. We live by the bus stop. I couldn't sleep at all for the first two nights because those buses made sounds like tanks. I woke up to the sound, I was disoriented, I had no idea where I was, what was going on, whether the tanks were coming, or if someone started shooting. A passing tram scares me in the evening, when the city is quiet, it feels as if a rocket is flying nearby. I don't wish anyone to experience the war. We hoped it would last for 5 days. I have friends in Kiev, Mariupol and I don't know if they live, how they live, where they sleep, how they sleep. I want it to end!"